How to Open a Door When Coronavirus is Closing our Doors

By Concentric Owner Jennifer Larson, LCPC, NCC

Originally posted in The Sounds newspaper, Volume 43, Number 15 on April 4, 2020 and later in published in the Illinois Mental Health Counselors Association (IMHCA), a division of Illinois Counseling Association (ICA), News Update. Click here.

You know the saying “When One Door Closes, Another Door Opens”? During this time, we can’t help to notice closed doors everywhere, from schools to restaurants to places of worship to retailers. Even our home doors are closed, keeping others away and containing us inside.  It may seem overly optimistic to think this quote holds true during this extraordinary and challenging time with COVID-19 knocking on everyone’s door.  Alarm bells are sounded within us daily, the threats are real and experienced by so many, and some of us feel our life has been hijacked.  So how can we during this time envision doors opening up or experience something positive from all of this? 

I am by no means suggesting doors are flying wide-open given the sheer number of doors that are literally closed and even locked. But, if you can take a moment to pause, focus and be intentional, you may find that you can open doors to otherwise missed opportunities. 

Psychotherapist and author Esther Perel states when faced with our own existential anxieties it can open the door to fully living.  Some of us may have been living life on auto-pilot depriving ourselves of certain reflections, experiences or opportunities. So, what does living fully exactly mean?

It can mean a lot of things, but to start, it can mean experiencing each moment and each day in the here-and-now noticing and appreciating all of life’s offerings. Perhaps you had been more disconnected from yourself, no longer appreciating your talents, thoughts, feelings and your body’s capabilities -- which you can now fully appreciate.  Or taking a moment to get out of your head to be fully present and connected with another person can offer you an opportunity to be transported, experiencing life through a different lens other than your own.  Also, fully activating your senses can bring about a subtle, yet powerful sense of fully living.  Consider next time you take a walk outside, notice all of your surroundings paying attention to each of your senses. Notice your positive feelings as you attune to your senses.  

Shawn Achor, an educator, researcher, and author, offers a number of research-based ways to live a happier life. One of them is to take a few minutes each day to write down 1 positive experience within the last 24 hours and provide 3 rich details about that experience. Also, write down your gratitudes, giving specific details.  And reach out to someone to fully express why you appreciate them.  We know giving to others not only makes us feel better, but helps the person on the receiving end feel happier too.

And last, what is something you can look forward to when the shelter-at-home Executive Order is lifted and you can bust out the sheltered seams?  Will it be something specific such as dining at your favorite restaurant?  A ritual or practice you will reacquaint with again?  For me, it will be telling myself “I get to go here or I get do this” which represents a door opening into seeing how choice and freedom are true gifts.

The Trap of Anxiety and Trauma

By Concentric Owner Jennifer Larson, LCPC, NCC

Driving my car in my early adult years filled me with freedom and curiosity. Didn’t matter if I was driving by myself, on city streets, highways or traversing the deserts of Arizona, I loved driving. Toggling between radio stations to find the right tune, opening up the windows to feel the fresh air hitting my face and throwing my hair around, hanging out with my thoughts, or being mesmerized by the pink and purple hues of Arizona’s sunsets were met and felt with ease, peace, and freedom. Fast forward several years later, and my experience of driving catapults me into feelings and sensations of feeling trapped and crippled by anxiety, panic attacks, and at times, dissociation.

To read the entire blog post on the Anxiety Relief Project’s website, please click here.

anxious while driving in traffic.jpg

Let's Talk About Complex Trauma

By Concentric Counselor Jordan Perlman, LPC, NCC

I imagine many people have heard of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) but not nearly as many are familiar with Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) which is lesser-known and unfortunately, not yet recognized in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders Fifth Edition (DSM-V). And while an individual with a PTSD diagnosis, which is often the result of an isolated incident, a person who experienced complex or repeated traumas requires different considerations.

But first, it’s important to understand the differences between each:

PTSD

According to the DSM-V, PTSD is diagnosed when an individual meets the following criteria that create distress or functional impairment last more than one month, which is not a result of medication, substance use, or other illness. The individual was exposed to one of the following: 

  • Death or threatened death 

  • Actual or threatened serious injury

  • Actual or threatened sexual violence 

  • Witnessing trauma

  • Learning that a relative or close friend was exposed to trauma 

Indirect exposure to aversive details of the trauma (usually in the course of professional duties), the individual must have at least one intrusive symptom that causes the persistent re-experience of the trauma in the following ways:

  • Nightmares

  • Flashbacks

  • Emotional distress after exposure to traumatic reminders

  • Physical reactivity after exposure to traumatic reminders

The individual must also experience avoidance of trauma-related stimuli after trauma either by trauma-related thoughts or feelings, or trauma-related external reminders.

Two negative alterations in cognitions and mood must be present where the negative thoughts or feelings began or worsened after trauma in the following ways:

  • Inability to recall key features of the trauma

  • Overly negative thoughts and assumptions about oneself or the world

  • Exaggerated blame of self or others for causing trauma

  • Negative affect

  • Decreased interest in activities

  • Feeling isolated

  • Difficulty experiencing positive affect

 Lastly, there must be alterations in trauma-related arousal and reactivity that began or worsened after trauma in the following ways: 

  • Irritability or aggression

  • Risky or destructive behavior

  • Hypervigilance

  • Heightened startle reaction

  • Difficulty concentrating

  • Difficulty sleeping

ComplexPTSDtrauma.jpg

 C-PTSD

Trauma typically associated with C-PTSD tends to be long-term, where the individual is generally held in a state of captivity, physically or emotionally. In these situations, the victim under the control of the perpetrator has little or no chance to get away or escape from the danger. Some examples might include:

  • Long-term domestic violence

  • Long-term child physical and/or sexual abuse

  • Neglect

  • Organized exploitation rings

  • Concentration/Prisoner-of-War Camps

  • Prostitution brothels

  • Recruitment into armed conflict as a child

  • Sex trafficking or slave trade

  • Experiencing torture

  • Exposure to genocide campaigns

  • Other forms of organized violence

Some might be wondering, why is this difference important then? This is because of exposure to long-term or prolonged or repeated trauma results in a broad range of symptoms that go beyond the diagnostic criteria of PTSD, a.k.a “simple” PTSD.  As such, the basic symptoms of C-PTSD are:

  • Somatization (physical problems, associated pain, and functional limitations)

  • Dissociation (a division of the personality into one component that attempts to function in the everyday world and another that regresses and is fixed in the trauma, spacing out, daydreaming, or feeling strong sensations of being disconnected from one self or the world)

  • Affect Dysregulation (difficulty with emotions, such as experiencing and/or expressing them, alteration in impulse control, attention and consciousness

  • Self-Perception (experience of their own perspective tends to be drastically different from how others perceive them)

  • Interpersonal Relationships (tend to be a struggle, difficulty with engaging with others, feeling distrustful of others)

  • Perception of Perpetrators (can be skewed, or longing to be loved by their abuser)

  • Systems of Meaning (doubt there is any goodness in the world, outlook on life can be dark)

Further, a 2018 study by Karatzias et al. found the most important factor in the diagnosis of C-PTSD was negative cognitions about the self, characterized by a “generalized negative view about the self and one’s trauma symptoms; attachment anxiety which is defined as involving a fear of interpersonal rejection or abandonment and/or distress if one’s partner is unresponsive or unavailable; and expressive suppression, conveyed by efforts to hide, inhibit, or reduce emotional expression.”

For those who may wonder why people affected by a long-term trauma “can’t just get over it,” the answer lies in the fact that even after a person is removed from the event, their brain may be permanently affected by that intense and prolonged trauma. And since a person’s nervous system is shaped by his or her experiences, stress and trauma over time, can lead to changes in the parts of the brain that control and manage feelings and the long-term effects are found on a physical and emotional level.  

Symptoms may manifest as:

  • Eating disorders

  • Substance abuse

  • Alcoholism

  • Promiscuity

  • Chronic pain

  • Cardiovascular and gastrointestinal problems

  • Migraines

  • Rage displayed through violence, destruction of property, or theft

  • Depression, denial, fear of abandonment, thoughts of suicide, anger issues

  • Flashbacks, memory repression, dissociation

  • Shame, guilt, focusing on wanting revenge

  • Low self-esteem, panic attacks, self-loathing

  • Perfectionism, blaming others instead of dealing with the situation, selective memory

  • Loss of faith in humanity, distrust, isolation, inability to form close personal relationships

Special Considerations for Survivors of C-PTSD from Childhood 

Many survivors of C-PTSD also experience Attachment Disorder which is a huge consequence of individuals who suffered complex trauma as children. Attachment Disorder is the result of a person growing up with primary caregivers who were regularly dangerous. Recurring abuse and neglect habituate children living in fear and sympathetic nervous system arousal, which over time creates them an easily triggerable abandonment mélange of overwhelming fear, shame, and depression. 

Because a child’s main attachment (to their primary caregiver) helps them learn to control their emotions and thoughts, when a caregiver’s responses are in tune with a child’s needs, the child feels secure. The child then uses this relationship pattern as a practice to build coping skills.

However, children who receive prolonged confusing or inconsistent responses from their primary caregiver are prone to be fussy, have a hard time calming down, may often withdraw from others and may have frequent tantrums. Unlike adults who have more tools to understand what is happening to them, children often do not possess these skills or have the ability to separate themselves from another’s unconscionable actions. Consequently, the resulting psychological and developmental implications become complexly woven and spun into who that child believes themselves to be, thereby creating a messy web of core beliefs that are harder to untangle than the flashbacks, nightmares and other posttraumatic symptoms that may surface later. Further, these disorganized attachments and mixed messages from those who are supposed to provide love, comfort, and safety - all in the periphery of extreme trauma - can create even more unique struggles that PTSD-sufferers alone don't always face.

Treatment Considerations 

While the symptoms can be daunting and the future seems bleak for someone who appears to be suffering from C-PTSD regardless of whether an individual has been diagnosed with a trauma-related disorder or not, there is help out there and there are ways to manage and help the individual cope. 

Treatment challenges include, Survivors:

  • Avoiding thinking and talking about trauma-related topics because the feelings associated with the trauma are often overwhelming

  • Relying on alcohol or other substances as a way to avoid and numb feelings and thoughts related to trauma

  • Engaging in self-mutilation and other forms of self-harm

  • Who have been abused repeatedly are sometimes mistaken as having a “weak character” or unjustly blamed for the symptoms they experience as a result of victimization and often have comorbid disorders such as dissociative identity disorder (DID), other specified dissociative disorder (OSDD), borderline personality disorder (BPD), depressive or bipolar disorders, anxiety disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorders, eating disorders, and substance abuse

Since many trauma specialists see Attachment Disorder as one of the key symptoms of C-PTSD, a relational, individual, approach will often be most beneficial for many of these clients. For many survivors, therapy is the first opportunity to have a safe and nurturing relationship.  Therefore, the therapist must be especially skilled to create the degree of safety that is needed to build trust or risk adding to the attachment trauma. Working with these clients is essential to the development of trust and relational healing and the four key qualities are empathy, authentic vulnerability, dialogically (when two people move fluidly and interchangeable between speaking and listening) and collaborative relationship repair. This makes therapy a teamwork approach where there is mutual brainstorming and problem-solving in a respectful way implying mutuality. All of these steps will provide the client with a “good enough secure attachment” to serve as a model for other relationships. 

However, and as expected, there is no “one size fits all” approach to working with individuals who have survived trauma, but one thing is for certain: recovery from Complex PTSD requires restoration of control and power for the traumatized person. Survivors can become empowered by healing relationships which create safety, allow for remembrance and mourning, and promote reconnection with everyday life. 

If you feel as though you have experienced complex trauma, it is important to know what happened to you was not your fault. While it is undeniable trauma changes the way we experience the world, I strongly believe like a phoenix, a person who suffered from trauma can arise from the ashes, stronger than ever before. This “stronger than ever before” is also known as “Post-Traumatic Growth.” Post-Traumatic Growth identifies a shift in personal strength and worldview as a consequence of trauma. Although you can’t change it, you can change what your life looks like going forward. One step you can take towards recovery is calling to schedule an appointment with a therapist who can help guide and support you on your healing journey. 

Finding Balance Between Healthy and Unhealthy Anxiety

By Concentric Counselor Charles Weiss, LPC

There are 10 seconds left of the clock in the state championship game and your team is down by 2 points.  You have the ball and the fate of the team is in your hands on what will you do next, either pass or take the game winning shot.  Sweat is protruding down your face, your heart is beating a thousand miles a hour, your mind is racing with a million and one different case scenarios on what you should do and then your anxiety starts to take over.  However, you realized that your anxiety has allowed you to think quicker on your feet and make better decisions, because you don’t let it control and consume you.  3, 2, 1 and throw up a prayer of shot from about 35 feet away from the basket, knowing that being vulnerable to your anxiety, you can live with the consequences…  Swish!  Game over and you have just won the state championship for your team.

Anxiety… What is it and what does to mean to us when it begins to take control; do we let it control our consciousness or embrace it as an opportunity of growth and self-discovery?  According to dictionary.com, anxiety is defined as “a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.”

When outcomes are uncertain to us in which we want to control, but can’t, anxiety can consume our every decision, thought and feeling.  It leads to panic, fear and vulnerability to the unknown, having us over-analyze every decision we make, postulating those “what if” scenarios.  Anxiety can so debilitating to someone when it’s severe and impacts our day-to-day activities.  Plain and simple, anxiety can suck!  Nobody wants to constantly live a life of panic, fear, worry and dread, wondering all the time, “What if?” When you let anxiety take control and inhibit your ability to just be “you”, it becomes unhealthy.

Anxiety Stress Meter.jpg


Is there a way to gain back that control over anxiety before it begins to consume us, crippling our sense of self and being vulnerable to “What if…?”  Anxiety is your body’s indication that something isn’t right, like a built-in warning system indicating that your homeostasis might be out of balance.  When we listen to our body as it talks to us and yes, our body does speak to us, you can begin to prepare and embrace for its impact and figure out how to manage it. Certain symptoms to be mindful of that can alert us when something “isn’t right” and anxiety begins to manifest itself within us, are the following:

·        Racing thoughts

·        Irritability

·        Headaches

·        Nausea/upset stomach

·        Disturbed sleep

·        Muscle tension/tightness

·        Shortness of breath

·        Mind going blank

·        Difficulty concentrating/focusing

·        Fatigued

·        Palpitations

When we are able to listen to these symptoms we experience, then we can to things to keep these symptoms in check before they exacerbate. Taking the time to do a body scan, deep breathing exercises, mindfulness exercises, progressive muscle relaxation techniques can all help keep the heightened level of anxiety at bay.

Can anxiety be healthy?

Anxiety can also be a way to motivate yourself to reach your goals and achievements that you have established.  It can better help prepare yourself to face as well as overcome challenges. When we approach anxiety as a hindrance, it can become unhealthy. You can instead capitalize on it as more of a way to inspire your self-growth and to live a more authentic life.  According to Katharina Star, Ph.D., anxiety is another way people can be more empathetic towards other people’s issues and concerns, and help with how they interact with others. She also stated that individuals who struggle with anxiety are often more cautious thinkers, problem solvers and decision makers because they are often building-in “back-up plans” for when things go wrong. 

Bottom line, anxiety isn’t always bad and unhealthy when individuals experience it, it can be a way people thrive if they are able to recognize it, understand it, and know how to cope and properly channel the healthy aspects of it. People can still live fully authentic lives when experiencing anxiety, it’s when it takes control and we begin to panic, that derails aspects of our lives.

If you are experiencing at least 3 symptoms of anxiety, that have been affecting your ability to function on a day-to-day basis in a variety of settings (i.e.: school, work, home) and those symptoms have been occurring for at least 6 months in which you find it very difficult to control that worry and anxiety, please contact your local mental health provider and schedule an appointment with a professional who can help you learn how to regain control over your anxiety and transform it into a healthier form of anxiety for you. 

Simple Meditation Steps For All Ages

By Concentric Counselor Michelle Taufmann, LCSW

These are the instructions for the basic meditation on the breath that I teach clients. Meditation on the breath is a simple, classic form of meditation that has been used for thousands of years to strengthen one’s focus and ability to sustain full awareness.

First, sit on the floor on a meditation pillow, or in a chair. Sit in a comfortable position with your back straight, but not rigid. If you are sitting in a chair it is best to sit forward with your back away from the back of the chair (rather than leaning back into the chair). You want
to assume a posture that facilitates being alert, yet relaxed. Next, close your eyes, or if you prefer, lower your to a gaze about a foot in front of your feet on the floor. The purpose of closed eyes (or lowered gaze) is to remove visual distractions from the field of perception. Now, take a moment to relax your head, neck, shoulders and arms by rotating them, tensing and releasing them, and/or shaking them out; these parts of the body tend to hold a lot of
tension.

mediationchair.jpg

You are now ready to begin the meditation on the breath. Start by noticing your breath as it comes into and out of your body. The experience of the breath coming into or out of the body is most noticeable in the following areas of the body: at the nostrils (the sensation of the breath going into and out of the nostrils), at the chest (the sensation of the chest rising and falling, and at the abdomen (the sensation of the abdomen rising and falling). Choose one of these areas on which to observe the breath. It usually works best to choose the area of the body where the sensation of breathing is the strongest for you. Now, simply attend to the breath. Think of it as being present to the experience of breathing. Your attention on the
breath should be light; you do not want to concentrate or think about the breath.

Once you have stabilized your attention on your breath, sit in this way for the designated amount of time. Ten minutes is the recommended amount of time for beginners. If you are like most people, you will fairly soon notice that your mind has wandered. When you notice
this, gently let go of the distraction, whether it is a thought, sound, or  internal sensation, and bring your attention back to your breath. Continue in this way, returning your mind to your breath each time you become aware that it has wandered. Remember to do this with
patience and gentleness.

Try not to become frustrated or judge yourself if your attention wanders frequently. Frequent mind-wandering is normal and to be expected, especially for beginners. Becoming frustrated or judging yourself for not being able to sustain attention on the breath is simply further distraction from your meditation practice and should be dropped as quickly and gently as other distractions are dropped during your practice. 

With practice, mediation of the breath will strengthen your focus and ability to sustain full awareness.